By Deepak Joshi Pokhrel

Every year, the globe celebrates 16 days of activism against gender-based violence amidst big fanfare. The event brings the women's rights activists under one banner to fight the injustices meted out to them. It also offers them the space to raise the collective voice demanding a society where girls and women can live without being assaulted—verbally and physically. Despite this, gender-based violence still continues to thrive in our society, throwing our decades-long efforts into the dustbin.

The international 16 days of activism against gender-based violence originated from the first Women’s Global Leadership Institute coordinated by the Centre for Women’s Global Leadership in 1991. The 16 days of activism against Gender-Based Violence start on November 25, the day commemorated as the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women and marks the beginning of 16 days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence. The event concludes on 10 December every year—the International Human Rights Day.

With the theme “Come Together, Act Now,” it is being organized across the country with high enthusiasm. To say, the advocates of women's rights have been leaving no stone unturned to make the event a huge success and contribute to making Nepal a safe place for girls and women. But why our feminists become very active during 16 days and remain passive in advocating for the cause of women and girls throughout the year is seldom discussed and accounted for.

When we talk about gender-based violence, we commonly believe that it is carried out by strangers. To the contrary, the perpetrators are intimate friends, relatives, and neighbors. A report titled “Femicides in 2023,” published by the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime, states that around 51,100 women and girls were killed at home by people closely related to them.

In our context, the National Demographic and Health Survey (2022) has highlighted that 27 percent of women who ever had a husband or intimate partner experienced violence committed by their current or most recent husband. The same report also showed that 23% of women aged 15 to 49 experienced sexual assault since age 15. Likewise, the report published by a reliable institution states that 65% of women have experienced domestic violence. The report also says that 90% of the perpetrators were male. On the other hand, 53% have faced dowry-related violence alone in Madhesh Province. Other forms of violence, such as polygamy, witchcraft allegations, and human trafficking, have been experienced by women in different parts of the country. These statistics are alarming and belies the rosy picture claimed by our so-called feminists and human rights activists.

From houses to offices, colleges, universities, buses, hotels, and restaurants, our women are not safe. They are sexually assaulted by the spoiled brats of big mansions. They are murdered after being raped. Their male counterparts intimidate and pass lewd comments in the office. In universities, the professor demands sexual favors in exchange for good marks in the thesis and dissertation. In plain words, women and girls are not safe. 

The biggest problem lies in our social structure. Our society is based on the assumption that males are dominant power while women are their subordinates. The male believes that women are for their consumption and should be confined within the four walls of the house. Such perception is deeply embedded in the individual psyche and social fabric. While the nation has transformed politically, we still are guided by orthodox and outdated thinking while dealing with women and girls.

The other party to blame is some international actors who fund the end of the gender-based violence in Nepal. Over the years, countless seminars and workshops have been organized in posh hotels and restaurants to send fabricated reports to please the donors who fund such heinous crimes against humanity. While the donors feel pleased seeing their funds bringing changes, the ground realities suggest otherwise. It is simply a way to please the donors to extract funds to not end the gender-based violence—something which is like a milking cow for so-called activists. 

Equally responsible is the ineffective implementation of laws and regulations. This has emboldened the courage of culprits, thinking that they can get away easily after committing the crimes. Over the years, we have introduced several programs aimed at ending gender-based violence. Such programs do not deliver the expected result owing to proper implementation and subsequent monitoring.

What puzzles this scribe is, that is what is stopping us from establishing a society where our girls and women do not have to fear the spoiled brat of a big mansion. What also astonishes this pen pusher is that gender-based violence continues to thrive in our society despite having all legal remedies in place.

The gender-based violence will not end until and unless we transform our society from a social perspective. The mindset of the male has to be changed, which is key to establishing a just and democratic society. No doubt, the 16 days of activism have been playing a central role in ensuring a fearless society for women and girls in this regard. It has fallen short.

We hope that the ongoing 16 days of activism against gender-based violence will continue its praiseworthy effort to end gender-based violence across the globe. We also hope that every actor—be it donors or government—will extend their support in making this a reality.